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nathan 2
Junior Member
United Kingdom
192 Posts |
Posted - 17 August 2008 : 20:35:51
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Thanks Skippy.
I work away and so hard for the benefit of my wife and child and so, if the fruits of this are to be taken away, then it makes sense that I work nearer to home for less money, even if that means that my disposable income will be less. The thing is, I don't want to be seen to be "playing the system". I wouldn't be looking to reduce my income if all things were going great (like they were in 2006) so I don't want to be thought badly of!
I would like to be closer to my family though. At present, I have to get up with the alarm at 4am to be on the road before 5am. I get home from work at around 7 to 8pm and so struggle to be bothered to make my own dinner. My schedule is so hectic at times that I have to stay out the night (which my company cover for accomodation) but I would rarely know what to pack myself if I did make my own lunch as I don't tend to eat at set times.
I do have to wear shirts, trousers and ties for work (although as I am a construction manager I tend to purchase from Tesco / Matalan and replace often enough to look OK).
Is the £20 holiday allowance for you or for the whole family? I can't see me being able to get us anywhere other than the back garden for £240 per year... but, i this is what is allowed then that's that!
Again, is the £40 per month for clothing for you or for the whole family? If it is per person, then we should be OK.
The hair cuts are OK, except my better half may have to wait an extra couple of weeks between visits to the hairdressers to accommodate the £8 or £10 per month shortfall.
Thanks for the advice and your time.
Nathan |
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Skippy
forum expert
United Kingdom
3290 Posts |
Posted - 17 August 2008 : 20:51:22
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I certainly wouldn't view it as playing the system or think badly of you. My dad was a lorry driver and spent a lot of time away from home and he told my mum that his main regret was spending so much time away from home. Sadly he was diagnosed with MS when I was 4, so he did get to stay at home, but he was too poorly to be able to enjoy it. That's why I feel that family is so much more important than money. My mum and dad didn't have much, but I they were always there for me, and to me that was the main thing. I hope that doesn't sound too sentimental!
There's only me, my other half and our cat, and OH isn't BR so the holiday, clothing and haircut allowances are just for me. Be warned though, some ORs won't allow a holiday allowance at all. I did try for £50 a month (hey, if you don't ask you don't get!) but it was unsurprisingly reduced!
Tomorrow is a mystery, yesterday is history, today is the present, a gift to make the most of.
View my blog at http://skippy13.blogs.bankruptcyhelp.org.uk/ |
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John
New Member
United Kingdom
73 Posts |
Posted - 17 August 2008 : 21:04:05
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Hi nathan I couldn't agree with Skippy more. I know what it's like to focus on work trying to build a better life for your family. When younger I was very focused in this way.
My kids are 29 ; 25 ; 17 & 7, in 2002 having been made redundant we sold our house and bought a guest house on the coast. This was, of course, all lost in BR, but for 41/2 years I spent many hours every day with my youngest daughter, something I hadn't the chance to do with the others. I wish I could turn back the clock!
Of course you bear the responsibility of earning an income but if BR teaches us one thing more than any other it's that there is only so much we need and the things that matter are free.
Back to the plot! I think your estimate of £700 is about right nathan which will cost you just short of £500.
www.Bankruptcyhelp.org.uk 0800 078 9367 |
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nathan 2
Junior Member
United Kingdom
192 Posts |
Posted - 17 August 2008 : 21:07:31
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That doesn't sound too sentimental at all and makes a lot of sense.
I am thinking along the same lines though. I grew up with my dad (also working in construction) working in Norway, Hong Kong, Vietnam, Italy, etc, etc... and he bacame only a disciplinary figure to see on holidays and weekends (depending on his work placement at the time). I don't want my lad to feel the same.
Do you think that they will take into consideration, when evaluating "allowable expenditure", that I am the only wage earner for a family totalling 3 plus the dog?
I mean, how on earth are we supposed to get a holiday on 1 persons' "allowable expenses"? |
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Skippy
forum expert
United Kingdom
3290 Posts |
Posted - 17 August 2008 : 21:25:04
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I don't know if it makes any difference but my OH works so I'm not supporting him.
Tomorrow is a mystery, yesterday is history, today is the present, a gift to make the most of.
View my blog at http://skippy13.blogs.bankruptcyhelp.org.uk/ |
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Trolly-Dolly
Average Member
591 Posts |
Posted - 17 August 2008 : 22:10:22
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Hi Nathan, I am going back to work part-time in a couple of weeks (we go BR in 9 days). I was previously fulltime with daughter 1, just so that I could pay creditors. However as long haul crew such precious times with her were lost. I honestly dont care if the OR frowns upon me going part-time less than a week after BR. There is no way I'll do full time with 2 little girls. I'd rather quit my job!
I know you want to do the right thing. But right for who? The creditors? or you and your family?
When I first found these boards I chose the former. Now its 100% the latter.
You can read my blog here;
http://drowningmummy.blogs.iva.co.uk/ |
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nathan 2
Junior Member
United Kingdom
192 Posts |
Posted - 19 August 2008 : 12:42:19
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Thanks for all the help and advice. (and sorry for the late reply... Work, work, work as always).
I am going to speak to my wife re: the job move as it does seem pointless to be working so hard and so far away just to earn a disposable income that will be taken from me!
More time at home would be fantastic and to get enough time to become a regular at the gym again would be super (all be it at my own expense).
Could anyone else offer guidance on what the OR may allow me as an allowance for holidays and clothing provisions please? maybe if someone is in the same situation as the only wage earner in a family, then they may be able to pass on their experience.
Many thanks.
Also, I have noticed on the forum that if a loan or credit card had been taken on, but say, 6 months of payments had been made before declaring BR (then it may not be looked at as being fraudulent and may not instigate a BRU. Do you think that the same may apply with the money that I repaid my mother in law a couple of months ago if enough time passes prior to me becoming BR?
Nathan. |
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