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sdh327
Starting Member
19 Posts |
 Posted - 05 May 2009 : 19:42:51
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I have filled in my forms and am summoning up the courage to visit my local court to petition my bankruptcy. But I have a few things I need to find out about first, am hoping you may be able to help. I have a partner and we are looking to move in together in the summer, my question is, what will be the effect on his property? will his address be black listed because of me? I'm moving in with him.
Also, he doesn't actually know that I'm considering bankruptcy, he doesn't knwo how much debt I'm in. I know I have to tell him at some point, but I know he wont take it well. Any tips for breaking this sort of news would be great! |
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gettingoutofdebt
forum expert
2418 Posts |
Posted - 05 May 2009 : 20:16:05
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Hi,
Before visiting the court you should call them as most courts operate on an appointment basis so it may be a few weeks before you have your BR appointment. If you are in London you can turn up at the RCOJ on the day and petition there an then.
If you are BR it shouldn't have any effect on the property so don't worry about the address being blacklisted. It would be advisable to keep the property in his name rather than adding yours.
As for advice about breaking the news, how about lots of alcohol, his football team winning on the day and the promise of good sex???
Only joking, there really isn't any good way of breaking this news but you could mention that he won't be liable or affected by your debts, you want a fresh start, etc. I am sure he will be understanding as the credit history of a girlfriend/partner isn't something that I have ever been interested in as a man. |
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sdh327
Starting Member
19 Posts |
Posted - 05 May 2009 : 20:26:01
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Thank you for your reply.
I had a feeling I may have to make an appointment before visiting the court, so calling them is really my first move.
He is desperate for me to move in with him, and I would be too if it wasn't for this hanging over my head. The problem is, that he is quite a judgemental person, he saw a bit of the news the other day, commenting about the rise in bankruptcies, he didn't have many complementary things to say!! The bulk of my debts are over 6 years old, I've learnt my lesson with money management, I haven't had any kind of credit for years.
Its such a worry. But I've got to the point where I know bankruptcy is the only option. I have to say, I have been browsing this site for a while, and its great reading about other people's experiences, its really helped.
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gettingoutofdebt
forum expert
2418 Posts |
Posted - 05 May 2009 : 20:40:09
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It's' always best to be honest about these things as he will probably find out in the future i.e. when you maybe get a mortgage together some time in the future.
The best thing to do is sit him down and just explain that you are declaring BR and the reasons why. All he can do is:
- Be understanding of your issue, which I am sure he will be
- Be scornful of your credit problems and want nothing more to do with you.
Chances are it will be a bit of both. In the first instance, if he really is that judgemental, then he may not understand the issues, which is why he is judgemental. Once you have explained the issue and why BR is the only option he will understand you reasons because he has strong feelings for you and wants you to live together.
Relationships are all about understanding and if he can't understand your financial issues, appreciate them and be supportive then, in the long run, you are probably better off without him. I know that sounds harsh but it's true. |
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sdh327
Starting Member
19 Posts |
Posted - 05 May 2009 : 20:49:45
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I couldn't possibly move in with him without telling him first, that would be an awful thing to do.
You are absolutely right, theres only 2 things he can do, stay or go!! I am hoping he will understand once I can go through all the reasons why etc.
I really needed to know how his home would be affected when/if i move in after being made bankrupt, hes worked hard on his credit history to make it outstanding! But if its not going to make any difference, then hopefully that'll reassure him. He knows I'm not irresponsible with money, hes mentioned that before, its just my past thats pants!!!!!!
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gettingoutofdebt
forum expert
2418 Posts |
Posted - 05 May 2009 : 21:11:49
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If everything in the home is in his name then your credit history won't be included so this won't affect him.
People who are that careful and responsible about their money, and credit history, as you are now and you boyfriend is, normally have a reason for it. In your case it is your debts from 6 yrs ago so maybe your boyfriend also has a skeleton in the closet regarding his financial history? |
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sdh327
Starting Member
19 Posts |
Posted - 05 May 2009 : 21:18:46
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He was in the enviable position of having paid off his mortgage before he was 35. He and his wife divorced, and he ended up paying her an awful lot of money from the house, he has had to remortgage and basically start from scratch again. I cant say I blame him for being the way he is about money, and his home. I've never owned my own home, I'm currently renting from my parents.
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sdh327
Starting Member
19 Posts |
Posted - 07 May 2009 : 16:08:12
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So my partner took it really really well!! I was very suprised, and he still wants me to move in with him! Hurrah!I'm so relieved that I can share this with him now.
Now I have a date with the judge, but its at the end of the month, which isn't a problem, but, the financial income I submitted on the forms will be different, ie. I wont have my job. I know I cant alter the details now I've submitted them, so can anyone advise me what I need to do? Is this something that will put me on a bad footing from the start with the OR?
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gettingoutofdebt
forum expert
2418 Posts |
Posted - 07 May 2009 : 18:11:05
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Glad to hear it went well with your partner.
With your income you can either mention this to the BR clerk when you are at the court and make changes with your initials next to each change or just leave it until the OR interview.
The income on the form won't make a difference to whether you are declared BR or not so I would leave it until the ORs interview. |
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sdh327
Starting Member
19 Posts |
Posted - 07 May 2009 : 20:47:44
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Thanks for that. I'll leave it until the OR contacts me.
Two weeks until I see the judge and I'm already having palpitations!
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totally lost
Junior Member
116 Posts |
Posted - 11 June 2009 : 11:49:44
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quote:
Originally posted by sdh327
Thanks for that. I'll leave it until the OR contacts me.
Two weeks until I see the judge and I'm already having palpitations!
Hi sdh327
Just read your post...very funny about the palpitations....I know ALL about those too!!!
I see that your debts were also a long time ago,6years. May I ask if this had any beneficial effects on your BR proceedings?
My debts are too from years ago and I have learnt so very well to be careful with money!!
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sdh327
Starting Member
19 Posts |
Posted - 17 June 2009 : 16:15:00
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I sorry, only just picked up your message.
I'm not sure how the age of my debt has affected the proceedings. I think you'd need an expert to answer that one.I had my OR interview while I was in tesco doing my grocery shopping, OR thought that was quite funny. She was more human than I was expecting! She said I didn't really need a formal interview, as I had written a pretty wordy statement on my SOA which covered just about everything, she queried if any of my debts were newer than 6 years old, which they aren't, she said she wasn't interested in my car as its not worth much and I need it for work. And that was about it. I had some paperwork to fill in about tax, things to sign to say the OR could speak to them etc. I haven't actually heard anything since, that must have been 2 weeks ago.
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sdh327
Starting Member
19 Posts |
Posted - 17 June 2009 : 16:45:32
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I've just had a chat with the OR about moving in with my partner and the effects on his property etc with my bankruptcy. Shes said that she is unable to answer hypothetical questions, and an assessment would be made after the change of circumstances. Whih doesn't help me atall!
I've already asked on here about his property being blacklisted, but I'd like to know if his income and assets would be taken into consideration at reassessment? Does anyone know? The last thing I want is for him to end up having to have his income assessed for repayment of my debts! |
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Hallway123
Junior Member
United Kingdom
181 Posts |
Posted - 17 June 2009 : 16:49:42
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| I'm pretty sure they can't investigate his income as he's not going BR, all they will want to know is how much you are contributing to household. |
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sdh327
Starting Member
19 Posts |
Posted - 17 June 2009 : 16:55:45
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| Thank you. This is proving to be a worrying issue, for both of us at the moment!I dont want to say 'yes it'll be fine, my debt, my assessment' and then find out the OR will want everything from him including his inside leg measurement!!! |
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Hallway123
Junior Member
United Kingdom
181 Posts |
Posted - 17 June 2009 : 16:59:53
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| I went BR 3 weeks ago and they didn't even ask what my husband earns, just how much he paid towards househole,Ijust told them the truth that he gives me half his jsa and they were fine with that. |
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I have filled in my forms summoning up courage
