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ONK
Junior Member
135 Posts |
 Posted - 22 February 2010 : 14:25:56
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Living in private rented at the moment which i moved into Nov 08 when i left my owner occ property + previous to BR.
Went BR in nov 09 - not discharged.
Need to move from current private rented ASAP , my sons father has discovered where we are living, he is a veery violent man and was fond guilty of 23 counts of violence when at court, against myself and my son (3yr old at the time).
As he is now aware of where im living, and making his presence known , i know i am no longer safe to be here. I have already been to the doctors and been offereeed anti depressants and counselling because of the stress / worry. This is just not me !!
I had been thinking of moving when i could due to disrepair of the property ( was left for 2 week at xmas / ew yr with noo heating / hot water) and still have hole in wall leading to outside. The landlord is hopeless , i left him 7 messages last week and he has not returned my calls yet. He does not want to spend any money on maintaining the property + has no other to offer me.
I have found another property at the other side of the borough - well away from where he would EVER find me. I explained my BR situation and they said its fine for me to have the property ( i have the holding fee and month rent / deposit) but due to the "risk" they want a guarantor, i have no one to ask. My mam owns her home but is retired and would not give her the satisfaction of saying no to me. There is no one else i can ask. Are there companies which offer this servce. Im trapped somewhere that is affecting my health , putting us at risk and is not being maintained properly. Im fully up to date with my rent , obviously have no other debts and the rent is affordable to me.
........ wishing i had a magic wand , make the need for a guarantor go away, or make one appear :(
Lyndsey
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Skippy
forum expert
United Kingdom
3290 Posts |
Posted - 22 February 2010 : 16:09:33
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Lyndsey, I'm so sorry you're having to put up with all of this. Have you told the police?
Have you spoken to the council about the possibility of a council property? I know very little about this (sorry), but it may be worth speaking to them.
Good luck x
View my blog at http://skippy13.blogs.bankruptcyhelp.org.uk/
Only when the last tree has died, the last river has been poisoned and the last fish has been caught will we realise that we cannot eat money.
30 IPA payments made, 6 to go - the end is in sight! |
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RHB
Senior Member
1159 Posts |
Posted - 22 February 2010 : 17:08:42
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| Does your mum know about your ex's violence? Surely she would say yes if so? |
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Richard P
Senior Member
United Kingdom
1701 Posts |
Posted - 22 February 2010 : 18:33:37
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HI Lynds
if ur ex was given a court conviction,(depends how long a go) it is likely that he is breach of conviciton, and subsequently be arrestable
contact the local Domestic Violence Team (Police and social services) they have contacts who can rehouse you at short notice.
if you do decide to stay in same city,you will bump into ex joint freinds who may alert you EX to your current where abouts
good luck again Richard
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ONK
Junior Member
135 Posts |
Posted - 22 February 2010 : 19:48:54
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Hi thanks for your messages.
Yes my mam is well aware of the situation involving him , she did give a statement at court about it, but she sees it as a "failure" of mine to have remained in that situation and to allow it to conntinue. I have asked for help in the past and have bee lectured then refused, a kind of "told you so" attitude. My father passed away when i was 16 so i have no other people to ask.
I worked for the local athority for 8 yrs as both a housing and homelessness officer, so i know that i would not get anything from them. They offered me a property when i still worked in that team + it was the biggest dive you have seen in your life.
I spoke to all the housing associations , they are in as much demand as the council and have stopped taking applications.
My only option is another private rent, I have been a fab tenant here, just need a little help to move on from here. I have looked at places well away from here + him. Would be no risk of being "found" again.
Wish i had a fairy god mother !! ha
Thing is if i cant get a guarantor im stuck herefor the forseeable future as my BR has only hapened in november and will continue to show up on credit check for such a long time in (in terms of needing to move house)
Lyndsey
xxx |
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Richard P
Senior Member
United Kingdom
1701 Posts |
Posted - 22 February 2010 : 21:27:20
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Hi Lynds
I appreciate that you have worked in the housing arena, But i have worked in the domestic violence arena, i can appreciate your situation from yours and your mums perspective.. please contact your domestic violence support team. for some people the DV team are the closest to a fairy god mother. |
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ONK
Junior Member
135 Posts |
Posted - 22 February 2010 : 21:44:16
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I appreciate your advice but I was supported by the PPU/DVU , Womens Aid etc etc for 18months , this stopped when I was "on my feet". I know the personn I am and to contact them again would cause m more harm than good. It is part of my lie I do not wish to dig up again. I have dealt with worse, i will find a way. I have to. To re-engage with their services is not right for me, it may help many others but i know the person I am and therefore know I cant.
I hope that doesnt sound rude, i dont intend that at all. I have/had drawn a line under it, i wont remove it now.
Lyndsey
xx |
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Richard P
Senior Member
United Kingdom
1701 Posts |
Posted - 22 February 2010 : 21:47:22
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It does not sound rude to me
i respect and understand your answer, just throwing options in the air
richard |
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ONK
Junior Member
135 Posts |
Posted - 22 February 2010 : 22:05:00
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i know and thank you for taking the time to reeply to me Richard. As we both know from our work experiences , there is no blanket solution to any issue. What works for one could be the worst possible thing for another to do. I know im the latter.
So bloody frustrating, Just wanna scream at them "give me a break, I have the money to secure the house, let me prove myself" Im certainly not going to let myself down let alone anyone else ! |
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Housing
Senior Member
United Kingdom
1399 Posts |
Posted - 23 February 2010 : 12:31:33
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Hi ONK,
As I see it, the local authority should have a duty to you as you have been through the DVU and the PPU.
You and I know (from experience) that often the local authority wil try to be shy on its duties and obligations!!
I assume you made an application under Homelessness provisions and that in that you cite DV - therefore this is enough to get you re-housed?
Have I missed something?
Good luck, Richard
quote:
Originally posted by ONK
I appreciate your advice but I was supported by the PPU/DVU , Womens Aid etc etc for 18months , this stopped when I was "on my feet". I know the personn I am and to contact them again would cause m more harm than good. It is part of my lie I do not wish to dig up again. I have dealt with worse, i will find a way. I have to. To re-engage with their services is not right for me, it may help many others but i know the person I am and therefore know I cant.
I hope that doesnt sound rude, i dont intend that at all. I have/had drawn a line under it, i wont remove it now.
Lyndsey
xx
"There are no problems - only solutions" |
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ONK
Junior Member
135 Posts |
Posted - 23 February 2010 : 21:15:17
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Hi Richard ,
If you recall, like yourself I have worked in housing / homelessness for a number of years an im only too aware of the "avoiding statutory duty tactics". Basically he has never lived at this address with me, i have had intervening settled accomm since i left my last address (which was also my owner occ address that i went BR for) so im not homeless due to DV. Its a new instance of homelessness. I would be able to apply only under harassment but we both know how hard that is to prove. The police would have to support that they were unable to make it safe for me to remain in the proprty , unable to put any measures in place etc etc. Which they wont be able to do as him "hanging around , making presence known" is not enough to cause them conceern. Despite the effect he has on me. They will determine that im not homeless as have property available for me which is suitable to meet my needs and there is no substantial risk. It stinks but thats the council!!
When i still lived in the last address they did accept me as homeless priority when i put hiim out. This was onn grounds of unafordability , harassment and violence. I had 999 points which was the highest on ouur scoring system at the time. I was an officer in that team and they still offered me a property they knew i would not accept , they discharged their duty , i appealed , i lost the appeal - as does everyone.
spoke to my mam for a while today (would rather have pulled my own teeth with no anasthetic, but hey ho) explained to her that as im undischarged etc i was findig it difficult to secure alternative accomm. Asked her to connsideer being guarantor so will just have to wait n see what she says. I know she would not do it to assist me , but hoping she would do it with my sonss best interests in mind.
Lyndsey
xx |
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Housing
Senior Member
United Kingdom
1399 Posts |
Posted - 23 February 2010 : 21:22:36
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Hi Lyndsey,
I wish you well - if you need to bounce some ideas across the ether, do so - I would love to be able to assist you.
In the meantime, I wish you and yours well
Richard xx
quote:
Originally posted by ONK
Hi Richard ,
If you recall, like yourself I have worked in housing / homelessness for a number of years an im only too aware of the "avoiding statutory duty tactics". Basically he has never lived at this address with me, i have had intervening settled accomm since i left my last address (which was also my owner occ address that i went BR for) so im not homeless due to DV. Its a new instance of homelessness. I would be able to apply only under harassment but we both know how hard that is to prove. The police would have to support that they were unable to make it safe for me to remain in the proprty , unable to put any measures in place etc etc. Which they wont be able to do as him "hanging around , making presence known" is not enough to cause them conceern. Despite the effect he has on me. They will determine that im not homeless as have property available for me which is suitable to meet my needs and there is no substantial risk. It stinks but thats the council!!
When i still lived in the last address they did accept me as homeless priority when i put hiim out. This was onn grounds of unafordability , harassment and violence. I had 999 points which was the highest on ouur scoring system at the time. I was an officer in that team and they still offered me a property they knew i would not accept , they discharged their duty , i appealed , i lost the appeal - as does everyone.
spoke to my mam for a while today (would rather have pulled my own teeth with no anasthetic, but hey ho) explained to her that as im undischarged etc i was findig it difficult to secure alternative accomm. Asked her to connsideer being guarantor so will just have to wait n see what she says. I know she would not do it to assist me , but hoping she would do it with my sonss best interests in mind.
Lyndsey
xx
"There are no problems - only solutions" |
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Landlord wants a guarantor !!!!
