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helen_w5
New Member
79 Posts |
 Posted - 03 August 2009 : 22:37:16
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Thanks sjbyron
Just need to avoid my boss finding out - there is nothing in my contract regarding BK but itsd just the sheer humiliation of the whole situation that i want to avoid, plus my boss knows my family really well etc etc
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sjbyron
Average Member
United Kingdom
746 Posts |
Posted - 03 August 2009 : 22:47:11
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Do you know your boss well? Could you speak to her/him "off the record" if they are a friend of the family it may be better to tell her/him.
Have you told your family
Stu J Byron |
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Morwenna
Starting Member
25 Posts |
Posted - 03 August 2009 : 23:18:35
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hi helen,
this is the first time i have replied to any body, if you don't want to go to the doctors to sort the feelings out try Bach flowers rescue remedy and vitamin b complex, these have helped me on many an occasion and are both made from plants, i am hopefully going br on the 18th august and am dreading it!! talking of dreading it marmite..... is another good source of vitamin b, take care |
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helen_w5
New Member
79 Posts |
Posted - 03 August 2009 : 23:31:09
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Hi Morwenna
So proud to be your first reply :)
Try to keep strong about your impending BK. If its the right thing to do then its the right thing to do - simple.....
Try to stay de-stressed (unlike me) and take good care of yourself.
It will all be over soon.
By the way, court day is easy, a little boring, but not scary - i promise xx |
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sjbyron
Average Member
United Kingdom
746 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 09:25:23
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Hi
Helen I would goto your GP there may be an underlying depression and aniety there, and it doesnt just start it festers for a while thhen a life changing event hits it off.
Stu J Byron |
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helen_w5
New Member
79 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 09:39:13
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thanks sjbyron
I have booked a doc appt for friday so i can discuss it then, although i dont like the idea of medication.
Do you think its normal that i feel this anxious? Im not even really sure what is bothering me.....
I know myself pretty well and I am a proud person which is obviously difficult now as i feel like a failure, also i am terrible with any sort of change, i am the sort of person that freaks out when change happens so i guess thats another reason why this is so hard for me emotionally. im not really that concerned about my credit rating because i know that it was shot to pieces anyway and on the DMP i would have had to pay for 8 years to be debt free, so my credit rating will recover much quicker this way. The other thing is that im so gutted that i will have to disclose my BK for the REST OF MY LIFE!!!! |
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mick1972a
Junior Member
235 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 11:56:53
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Hi Helen, you should be proud of what you have done, its not an easy step going BR and a lot of people just let the situation go on and on and it get worse and worse. Its a really positive thing that you have done so hopefully you will start to feel better soon.
Just try to focus on the positives and not having to worry about debt anymore.
Good luck
Mick |
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helen_w5
New Member
79 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 14:34:32
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Thanks Mick
I know you are right, I just hate the fact that I have to live with the stigma for life! Its not like an IVA where when its done its forgotten, you always have to declare BK FOREVER 
It makes me sad, but I went out with a friend of mine for some coffee (on her)  this morning and felt an almost strange sense of 'normality'.
I just am scared that the Nil Tax code will mean that my boss will find out - I work for a company with five people only on the payroll!
Is it an option to request that the OR takes my tax at the end of the year from HMRC rather than every month?
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sjbyron
Average Member
United Kingdom
746 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 14:49:28
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Hi Helen
it seems that you may have depression and anxiety and as I said in a previous post they are not something that just happens its a cumulative effect and takes one fact or trigger point to finaly set it off, have you had days in the past when you have been really down, and have you had days in the past wher you have felt like you are now?
I would speak to your GP about it,
You Should be proud that you have faced your debts andd dealt with them with the best solution for you.
Please speak to your GP Though
Stu J Byron |
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helen_w5
New Member
79 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 14:56:08
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Hi sjbyron
I think you are right. I'm not sure if I have ever felt like this before, but I have got a lot on my plate at the moment, other than bankruptcy, my 22 year old brother is chronically ill and has been this way for 18 months now and they cannot establish his condition, im half way through a tough degree and i have been struggling with money for so long now I guess even though I put on a brave face I am down about all this - its only to be expected with all this going on. I think I have some sort of burn out. This is just the icing on the cake I guess.
Thanks for your advice. I am at work currently and I have to say that I am feeling so much better now I have got out of the house and got into a semi normal routine, but I am keeping my doctors appointment so that I can discuss my feelings with someone medically trained.
Thanks for your help |
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sjbyron
Average Member
United Kingdom
746 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 15:15:34
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Best of luck with the Doctors, and best of luck with the unviersity course, I found my third year the easiest and fastest of the three.
Keep posting and well done again for facing and dealing with your debt problems.
Ps
Hope your borther gets well or medically stable soon
Stu J Byron |
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helen_w5
New Member
79 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 15:28:48
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Thanks sjbyron....
Im feeling much more in control and positive the only thing concerning me now is the NT code allowing my employers to find out - embarrassing!
Im going to speak to the OR - do you think its possible that they could collect the tax in one go at the end of the tax year? I know that in some cases they do this as routine.... |
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sjbyron
Average Member
United Kingdom
746 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 15:35:08
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Hi
Why dont you provide the OR with wage slips and explain that your earnings are below the threshhold so you dont pay much or any tax, therefore would it be worthwhile to place an NT
Just a thought but it may work
Stu J Byron |
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helen_w5
New Member
79 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 15:41:13
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I am definitely going to try that, but my concern here is that as its been summer break from uni I have worked a lot more. My tax has ranged from £50 - £90 per month so its hard to say "in the future it will be less"
I will definitely try though  |
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sjbyron
Average Member
United Kingdom
746 Posts |
Posted - 04 August 2009 : 15:48:33
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Yep give it a go, explain that you were only doing vacation work and you dont have any planned.
If You reduce your hours or leave work the OR would see this as suspicious ie trying to get away from an IPA.
Best of luck
Stu J Byron |
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Topic |
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I actually feel like suicide is an option
